WARNING! Now that you clicked this link, there's an 80% chance you've been infected by the contaminated individuals and topics within. This is something that started out a joke and seriously took off into something I never expected but man was it fun. Would LOVE to make this a weekly thing but its on all of YOU to provide the content. So without further ado I bring you the the contaminated area of LG's AHL WEEK 1 . (Otherwise known as my fake anonymous stories by Donny, (by the way when can we just bury it and be lovers on snapchat?) Week 1's Contaminated Areas LeHigh Valley - (2/5) Reports are to start a GoFundme for players and a Manager to buy their way off the Phantoms already. Some have said that GM Sportsfreak is all about the 'Welcome to the team vibe', but don't worry about playing with us if you don't want to.... Not sure what that is even supposed to mean or does he want guys to magically adapt to guys who have never played together? Team started off really well actually and wont their first 2 games, but then followed that up by 7 straight losses. Week 2 should be interesting, if they don' have someone step up and wear the pants, the Phantoms could be a top candidate for a MELTDOWN. San Antonio Rampage.. actually just @DeMxrco8 - (3/5) Way down yonder on the chatahoochee , where we wanna scrub hunt but we get no cooochie. Insiders are now saying that Demarco's ego is reaching a category 4 but with cool headed management in @Reider x 95 and @Pelley_ this storm has been downgraded to a level 2. After an 0-3 week i'm sure he was rattled to say the least and watching the stream I felt bad for Pelley. If you haven't seen Demarco play, he's a PSN guy who when you watch him it's like refuses to admit he's ever wrong and will continue to hold LT until he commits 29 turnovers...oh wait he did do that and is 2nd in the entire league in giveaways already. Not to mention he made his XBOX team wait and almost forfeit game one, and started 5 on 3 where they were put in a hole. Hope to see a new and improved DeMxrco next week! Malchesky - (4/5) The living definition of someone who ruins every teammate around him. Loved this quote by another manager "Malchesky is a C student who think's he always deserves an A if he tried harder, but when he actually does try he graduates with a D-". Throw in that he's on the worst contract in the AHL at 7,500,000 while diving on the ice, you have to wonder how he's still around and not waived or just banned at this point. Papa Johns and that guy from ShamWOW are proud to present you with Mal on Ice...Who disappears.... Mal tries to drive the goal, bobbing and weaving, sweat dripping down his controller and snipes...the air. Instead of back-checking in a one goal game ,he lays on the ice a second time and takes out his own RW, leading to an odd man rush and the dagger goal. Just can't handle the guilt anymore and its too much, he's gone at the faceoff following the goal. I BeLeaf x - (5/5) There's nobody that deserves week 1's top spot more than I BeLeaf x. How has is this kid even allowed to signup anymore?!?! Feel terrible for new Firebirds owner @McQxade as he is now stuck with a kid who is proven to just signup to be banned. Just running down the numbers real quick... ---i BeLeaf x has been issued a 2 Season Ban in Season 34 of the LGHL 2019-10-17 08:32am ---i BeLeaf x has been issued a 2 Season Ban in Season 32 of the LGAHL 2019-02-19 11:44am ---i BeLeaf x has been issued a 3 Season Ban in Season 30 of the LGHL 2018-08-03 10:23pm WITH A GRAND TOTAL OF 29 REMOVAL WARNINGS! Dear God, Tris and Brodie step in, Enough is enough. Special Considerations @Roubidoo aka Roupipoo @TertleToes aka Best RW you'll ever see @DevilDan74 aka The Villian? @I Eden l If you ever need a goalie spam with invites he's around @l1l Sharp l0l , go back to the East ghez @l SaIty I , ask him why he's salty @SyNS x Crusade Asked to start the beef today, prefer mine medium rare TY @GRITTY 16 , has anyone ever said anything bad about you wtf @althewall , Need proof of this hot sister @Mr WorldWlde 69 Always down for a good time, tough guy outside, softy inside @Bush WooKie oo , Anyone looking to tryout he's your guy THIS IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES!!!! JUST LAUGH AND ENJOY Damn Trolls.
Great write up as usual, hope this is a weekly thing! I'm invisible on and off the ice so nobody knows me enough to say anything bad.